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The apocalyptic conclusion to the New York Times bestselling Abhorsen series—an epic fantasy experience not to be missed. The Abhorsen Sabriel and King Touchstone are missing, leaving only Lirael—newly come into her inheritance as the Abhorsen-in-Waiting—to stop the Destroyer. If Orannis's unspeakable powers are unleashed, it will mean the end of all Life. With only a vision from the Clayr to guide her, and the help of her companions, Sam, the Disreputable Dog, and Mogget, Lirael must search in both Life and Death for some means to defeat the evil destructor—before it is too late. . . .
Acorna the "unicorn girl" -- found as a baby years ago, abandoned and floating alone in an escape pod at the far end of the galaxy -- has made peace with her past, her Linyaari heritage, and with the powerful "differences" that set her apart from the loving humans who raised her. But only in the deep reaches of limitless space can she truly feel at home. Now, aboard the interplanetary salvage vessel Condor, Acorna is free once more, traveling through space in the company of her good friend, ship's commander Captain Jonas Becker, his gargantuan feline "first mate" Roadkill, and Aari, a proud Linyaari survivor of torture at the hands of the savage, bug-like Khleevi. But the journey is interrupted when a transmitted distress call -- faint but undeniable -- draws Acorna and her companions down to the surface of a nearby planet. What awaits them is a world of wonders, shrouded in an atmosphere of strange, intoxicating perfumes. Intelligent, sentiment plants help guide Acorna, Becker, Aari, and RK to the source of the SOS. But a broken, burned out -- alien ship is all they find, the pitiful remnants of a relentlessly brutal yet carefully coordinated assault. To Acorna, the signs are unmistakable. This is the grim handiwork of the cold-blooded species that seeks the complete eradication of all human and Linyaari life from the galaxy...the Khleevi! And suddenly all that Acrona holds dear is in grave peril. Because the devastation that was wrought here was no isolated occurence, but the opening move in a planned onslaught that will decimate the two races to whom Acorna is culturally, emotionally, and genetically tied. A worlds-shattering catastrophe is in the making -- unless one courageous and beautiful young woman with remarkable healing powers and her small, motley group of friends can go the unthinkable: discover the fearsome insectile enemy's greatest weakness...and strike first.Add to cart
Finally, the wait is over. The most comprehensive collection of Chuck Norris facts from the New York Times bestselling series by Ian Spector is ready to blow your mind. Only the manliest of men will be able to handle this bind-up of The Truth About Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris vs. Mr. T, Chuck Norris Cannot Be Stopped, The Last Stand of Chuck Norris, and over one hundred new facts. There is nowhere to run, nowhere to hide from these 1,500 facts about the man so powerful we quake when uttering his name: Chuck Norris.Add to cart
Three hundred years ago, she sold her soul to a demon. Now she wants it back.For centuries, the woman calling herself Maliha Crayne has lived a second life—as an assassin for the malevolent creature who owns her soul. A haunted killer with the blood of countless victims on her hands, she has finally discovered a way to nullify the demonic pact that chains her: If she saves a life for every one she has taken, she will be free. But if she fails, her punishments will be unspeakable, unendurable . . . and neverending.
Darrell Hammond is best known for taking over the late Phil Hartman’s role on Saturday Night Live as the resident Bill Clinton impressionist. But perhaps the most influential sketch of Hammond’s career was as Al Gore in the first presidential debate of the 2000 election, opposite Will Ferrell as George W. Bush. Everyone who saw the piece remembers each candidate’s final statement—“lockbox” for Hammond as Gore—but few know that Hammond cut himself before going onstage that night when he couldn’t remember how to do Gore’s voice. Those are the stories that make Hammond’s memoir, God, If You’re Not Up There, I’m F*cked, worth reading, even though most of his memories don’t live up to that one.Add to cart
Haiku for the Single Girl by Beth Griffenhagen and Illustrated by Cynthia Vehslage Meyers (review copy) - An uproarious, uplifting and brazenly honest gift book that celebrates the single girl's life in 72 haikus I feel its approach, Inevitable as death: Internet dating. Unsolicited relationship advice from relatives, disastrous dates, men who wear thumb rings, and the moments of deep satisfaction when a single girl realizes that (unlike her smug married friends) she can do whatever she wants with her time - it's all here in this brilliantly incisive and witty collection of haikus. Every woman - whether single or not - will laugh until she cries, and then start laughing all over again.Add to cart
Ian Punnett—a Minneapolis-based Episcopal pastor and radio host—has come out with How To Pray When You're Pissed At God: Or Anyone Else for that Matter. (Admittedly the P word is only PG-13. But still. For a pastor, that's a big deal). Title aside—and the title is significant, as it got the book banned from Christian radio—How to Pray is actually a heavyweight (but funny) look at the meaning of evil, and the importance of righteous anger in our lives—and the Bible's use of naughty words. Punnett gives us many sample prayers, including "An Angry Prayer for the Victim of Corporate Greed" to "An Angry Prayer for Those Who Are Cut Off in Traffic."Add to cart
Because no one will write an unauthorized biography about Emmy-winning actor and comedian Chris Elliott, he has done it himself. You’re hereby warned that much of this book will be disturbing. The Guy Under the Sheets is a behind-the-scenes memoir so personal, so provocative, that Elliott nearly sued himself to halt publication: The most shocking revelation, corroborated by numerous unnamed sources, is that Elliott is not the absurdist comedian that Rolling Stone once called "a genius". In fact, he’s a slightly dim-witted no-talent from a celebrity family who managed to convince a whole generation of disillusioned youth that he was funny.Add to cart